Be There
I was asked this week "Why do you give the way you give, nurture the way you nurture, bolster people how you do? Why are you 'there' the way you are... so absolutely?"
Firstly, I was flattered it was seen that way. But the answer was this: "It's what you do when you're in herd" This is a line from the movie Ice Age, and it kinda stuck with me, I use it often.
Now to me, a 'herd', applies to anyone in your love circle. These are people who fill up your world, people you go to the mat for. I have never done love half way - I love you, you KNOW, it's unmistakable.
The other part of the answer is - I give what I long to get - that 'golden rule' thing about doing unto others huh? I think this element is part of the motivation of human behavior in general.
I don't believe that unconditional love - a highly overused term in my opinion - exists except between infant and parent. But I do believe in selfless love, love that sacrifices for another, love of emotional and spiritual maturity.
The term 'be there' is used a lot, gets a lot of lip service.
To me though it isn't just be there when it's easy or convenient, it's be there when you're already exhausted from the demands of your own life, when it isn't convenient, in the middle of the night, at work, when you feel like you haven't really got it left to give, but do anyway.
To truly 'be there' you have to be willing to get dirty, to take on the dark side of a soul - the open wounds gushing blood, the vomit spewed, the tears, the choking on words that won't come, the not being able to breathe, the shaking uncontrollably, the despair. And sometimes, it's be there even when you don't feel entirely safe too - like you're being pulled into the swirling tornado, and even when it's taken for granted - when you're SO good at being there, a person doesn't recognize the effort, energy expenditure, the price you pay (though clearly if this went on for long, it would diminish your investment)
"I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back"
Firstly, I was flattered it was seen that way. But the answer was this: "It's what you do when you're in herd" This is a line from the movie Ice Age, and it kinda stuck with me, I use it often.
Now to me, a 'herd', applies to anyone in your love circle. These are people who fill up your world, people you go to the mat for. I have never done love half way - I love you, you KNOW, it's unmistakable.
The other part of the answer is - I give what I long to get - that 'golden rule' thing about doing unto others huh? I think this element is part of the motivation of human behavior in general.
I don't believe that unconditional love - a highly overused term in my opinion - exists except between infant and parent. But I do believe in selfless love, love that sacrifices for another, love of emotional and spiritual maturity.
The term 'be there' is used a lot, gets a lot of lip service.
To me though it isn't just be there when it's easy or convenient, it's be there when you're already exhausted from the demands of your own life, when it isn't convenient, in the middle of the night, at work, when you feel like you haven't really got it left to give, but do anyway.
To truly 'be there' you have to be willing to get dirty, to take on the dark side of a soul - the open wounds gushing blood, the vomit spewed, the tears, the choking on words that won't come, the not being able to breathe, the shaking uncontrollably, the despair. And sometimes, it's be there even when you don't feel entirely safe too - like you're being pulled into the swirling tornado, and even when it's taken for granted - when you're SO good at being there, a person doesn't recognize the effort, energy expenditure, the price you pay (though clearly if this went on for long, it would diminish your investment)
"I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back"
posted by MysticSpirit (Sass) at 11:20 AM
4 Comments:
yeah, when it gets tough, when most flee. You're as "there" a person as I know. Surrounded by fire.
ya, I'm with Edge
you do 'there' more / better / stronger than anyone I know
seems to me you might need some 'there' yourself now and then
I know this girl I've experienced her 'there'. you love like no other doll
Maybe you are just too nice to people.
-----
"To truly 'be there'
you have to be willing to get dirty,
to take on the dark side of a soul."
That is a great quote.
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